Advice forum

Me and my husband are separating and try in to sort out finances ourselves. When taking into account my pension do I need to look at my full pension or just the value from the contributions made in the time we have been married?

Janine at 18.11.2024 11:54:28

11

Can I take into my.ex wife's savings when calculating maintenance her maintenence

R Home at 04.11.2024 18:19:25

67

I applied for divorce from my husband over a year ago. He is a very high earner (£400k) but since then has spent unprecedented amounts of money (after his mortgage on a separate house £12k per month). It has drained funds that would have been part of the matrimonial pot but he says this is ‘normal’ spending. I am on the other hand a ‘saver’ and have spend the year trying to build up reserves to protect my future. I am currently not working for a number of reasons I won’t go into here but related to events leading up to the divorce. Will and should his spending be considered when we negotiate the settlement?

AnonEM at 15.10.2024 7:09:17

130

I have a house from 30 yrs ago from previous divorce in my name only . Have never lived there together and have rented out for past 8 yrs since marriage and he has never contributed to it or paid any bills . I receive rent into my personal account and transfer an amount each month into joint account with husband to pay current mortgage and bills. He is now saying it won’t be considered non marital asset . In contrast he owns a property landlord business consisting of 18 flats also acquired pre marriage from 30 yrs ago and he pays wages from the rental income into joint account too. Would his business be considered non marital too if my house was? V v confused by reading conflicting info online

Sarah at 28.08.2024 21:22:54

138

Can u still use this service if one is more amicable than the other?

Kim at 01.07.2024 19:49:29

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I agreed a financial split with my ex which doesn't feel fair - but for personal reasons I am looking to avoid nasty negotiations and the bullying that will come with it. My ex earns 4 x my salary and has a large pension, I am now on Universal Credit, (I also work almost full time as well as care for our children) and struggling financially. I have debt accrued in our marriage, he has paid most of his off, and I have a very small pension as I didn't work for a while after having our children. Would a court be able to say that the consent order drawn up is unfair? I'm worried about negotiations if so and how that would end up for me. Thank you.

Lydia at 10.06.2024 10:02:04

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Just wondering as me and my wife are quite far through getting divorced who gets the house and is it split 50/50?

Jake at 25.03.2024 11:30:42

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Hello. My wife and I are discussing a possible divorce. The next steps would be to decide our financials, where we live and how to look after the children. I have been made aware that I may struggle financially due to being the male counterpart and the finances benefitting my partner, this worries me greatly. What happens to me if I am unable to afford a place to stay, especially in the current climate of cost if living. What happens if I am unable to work as much due to wanting to see my children more? I came to the party with money, whereas my partner had nothing, does this really get shared out between us?

Lorne at 17.10.2023 10:56:57

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Hi I PURCHASE A HOUSE 5 YAERS AFTER GET MARRIED MY HOUSE IS ON MY OWN NAME I paid for the deposit and the morgage monthly. I still have 125000 pounds to pay for 20 years. I separated 7 years after our marriage and divorce in 2022. My husband said he wants half of the house despite he never contributed for it. I do not want half his pension neither his child support for my son who is 15 years old. What is the solution for him to get nothing

Raouda at 03.10.2023 15:13:52

900

Hi, Our family home has been advertised for sale on the open market since we went to court for financial settlement. I am in a position to buy my ex out of his share by remortgaging and I have a mortgage in principle in place. How do I go about buying him out? Obviously I don't want to go through an estate agent. I just want to transfer his share of the house to me and pay him his share of the equity.

Louise at 03.10.2023 12:22:09

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Hi there. I am still married to my wife and we still share a home. We have two children and although I am not sure if this is a final decision on my wifes part, I was wondering what guidance you can offer on shared finances. My wife is the primary breadwinner earning around 50% more than I do. We still have a joint account for monthly outgoings including mortage etc and we put an equal amount in monthly. In the past year however, my wife has been on four holidays on her own whilst I struggle on my remaining salary each month to be able to do anything for myself or take my children away. Prior to our trial separation, any extra income we both made would be put into joint savings. With my wife's excess earnings each month, should I still be able to access these funds in order to be able to take my children away on a break?

Gordon at 03.07.2023 19:00:41

1031

Hi. I am still married to my wife and at the moment we have seperated though are still living in the home with our children. Although I would like to work through things I think my wife does not want to and intends to take things to the next step. My wife is the primary bread winner in our home (I was for a number of years before taking a career change which has meant I now freelance and earn around 30% of my previous salary). My wife is in full time employment whilst I freelance and roles I take can be sometimes a month or two apart. My major panic and concern at the moment is finances moving forward and being able to support my children whilst also working. If we were to sell our home / I was to be bought out I would be unable to afford a mortgage on my own due to my lower salary whilst my wife would be comfrotable and able to either borrow enough for a new home and / or afford the mortage on our existing home. She is also likely to inherit a significant sum of money in the near future. At the moment the only option I can see is that I would be forced to move away from my children in order to be able to afford somewhere suitable for them to live with me when I had them but this may be so far that I would only be able to have them at weekends or holidays. What financial support could I potentially receive? Thank you

Peter at 25.05.2023 16:20:03

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Hello! I have been married 2 years and separated for nearly one year now. The divorce is nearly over and was approved by the court but for the finances I want to do a consent order to have a clean break. We never had kids, properties or much shared. We don't want anything from each other, each to their own. However, he refuses to fill in any paper work because he doesn't like paper work. He agrees to not want anything, just not to fill forms or questionnaires. I tried to explain that amicable is the best and cheapest option and sent the website for him to get a consultation, which he refuses and tells me to do whatever I want. A bit tricky because we agree on the outcome, just not on the process. Any advise on how to deal with it? If I go ahead, is he "forced" to respond? I doubt. If I go to court (which I don't want considering we have nothing to divide) and he refuses to fill forms, show up, respond - what happens? What's the best route? Can amicable help with this, if he refuses to look for information and have a mediation conversation and do paperwork? Would the court force it? Thanks!

Maria Alpuim at 14.05.2023 12:45:52

1324

My husband is planning to leave. What financial support can I expect to get to help me with my children and home?

Kate at 26.04.2023 22:51:02

1068

Hello everyone, Thank you in advance for any help you can offer me. Basically, I haven’t got divorced yet, but looking into it very soon. The problem I might have is, the family home is only in my name and my ex has forced me out of my own house due to me reporting her to Social Services, so I was advised to stay away. My question is, once I’m divorced (she is likely to NOT go for my assets because she is a Christian and doesn’t believe in taking something that doesn’t belong to her) can I move back into my house. We have 2 young children under the age of 8, so with that in mind, and a ‘Clean Break’ divorce, does she have to move on and make her own living arrangements. Bear in mind she hasn’t contributed to a single penny of the mortgage, plus with her beliefs about not claiming anything from me financially, am I in a strong position to get my house back. I wouldn’t make my 2 boys homeless if by the time the divorce was finalised, I’d let them stay until my ex has an adequate home. Also, she has an occupation order to live there until her university course is completed at the end of the year (qualified nurse) and in full time employment. This is what the judge set out in the order, so I’m assuming she wants to live there until qualified, so this might be when she wants to move out and go her own way. Thanks again in advance.

Craigy at 07.04.2023 13:29:52

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Asking for family member who is too ill at the moment to ask herself in financial settlement home pensions assetts ect can husband who has left wife demand his pension shared  And refuse to consider offsetting as wife 65 retiring in May no savings wants to stay in house husband 53 good job wants to sell house . If offsetting on the table she could manage but otherwise would be homeless Thank you

Ks at 03.04.2023 15:12:59

1099

My ex and I agree to keep what we have (married 5.5 years and separated for 4 years) as we always kept them separate Can the judge reject clean break order we agreed in case of difference in value of assets? Can they award one of us assets to even out the difference? And how big does the difference in assets have to be for them to reject our order - 50k, 100k or more?

Soke at 21.03.2023 19:55:13

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I have always paid the mortgage, council tax, energy bills. My wife has a good salary but has only ever paid the shopping. She left me and we are now separated, but her only contribution towards about £2000pm of these costs is £300 towards shopping (half the monthly shop). She is now renting. I begrudge paying her half of the mortgage now as we are separated. Should I expect her to pay 50/50 or should the financial arrangement be whatever it used to be? And is there any legal guidance saying so? Thanks

dizzy70 at 17.03.2023 13:29:57

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If I'm applying for a consent order, do I need to wait for applying for my final order? We've been notified by the court that we can apply for our final order? Just want to get this all sorted.

Louise F at 07.02.2023 11:17:36

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I purchased a flat a couple of months before our civil partnership - I saved up for 10 years for that deposit. The mortgage has only ever been in my name and I've been the only one working full-time for the past 8 years. I want to apply for a dissolution and my ex-partner has mentioned a few times that half the property is hers which I don't feel it's fair. Would 50/50 still be the starting point under the law?

Karen at 15.01.2023 11:25:15

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Hi, My husband and I have been separated for over 2.5 years. He has a new partner (I don't). He has a 5 year old child with this partner. I live with our 19 year old twin sons (one at university, the other not yet working or in any kind of further/higher education), in the former matrimonial home. One of our sons is suffering from anxiety and OCD which has largely been triggered by the separation. I have an underlying health condition. My husband wants us to divorce (I don't object to this) but also to sell the house. Ideally, I wouldn't want to move yet but it looks as if I'm going to have to, before too long. I saw a solicitor last summer, who advised that I would be entitled to more than a 50% share of the proceeds from the sale of the house but my husband is angling for a 50/50 split. He has recommended to me that we go through Amicable to save money but I am worried that this may not be the best idea as I think that it is a given that we will end up disagreeing about the percentages of the split of money in the end. I would really appreciate your thoughts on this. Thank you very much

Sharon at 08.01.2023 2:23:58

1121

I started my divorce online through the government. We've got our conditional order and now need to sort our finances. My wife and I are in complete agreement with what we want to do and who keeps what. It looks like we just need to fill out the d81 form? Do you help with this or do we need to do anything else? Thanks!

Gareth at 06.01.2023 10:41:09

1399

Can you please explain what do you mean by "The applicant is not intending to apply to the court for financial orders. " Does it mean that the applicant is not gonna interfere with my property or assets?

Sammy at 09.12.2022 16:31:55

2791

Hello, i have started the divorce process to my husband, we have the decree nicie, we have aggreed all about the children, we still get on, we have agreed the amout i will receive from his army pension, however (army pension office) say they cant devide the army pension without a signed/stamped order from the judge, we cant get this without going to mediation, how do i go about us getting this without spending loads of money?

natasha smith at 20.11.2022 10:45:08

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Hi, I have rented my property to my brother on an Assured Shorthold Tenancy for the last 4 years. I pay for the mortgage, insurance some bills, and make rent demands like any regular landlord. He lives their with is spouse and children. Rent is charged under the terms of the AST I hold in agreement. The tenancy is in rent arrears but where he is my brother I have not taken formal action of recovery and are naturally more lenient with him as a family member, My concern is that with his spouse about to divorce him (it is still early days) that my property asset is at risk from being included in the martial pot as I have perhaps shown more charity as a Landlord than I would have compared to a non-family member, however, that is subjective, as despite being my sibling I have a signed agreement, issued tenancy paper work, issue rent statement of arrears etc. like any regular landlord. Any advice would be appreciated.

Woody at 19.09.2022 15:58:20

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My wife of almost ten years has said she wants to divorce. She is likely to inherit a large sum from her father in the next 6-12 months and this is potentially in the region of £300-500,000. We have three small children and share a joint mortgage. We will likely sell the home and split the proceeds 50/50. However, I have a much smaller salary than my wife and will be unlikely to afford a mortgage on my own so will likely have to rent. As my wife will have a large inheritance she will be able to afford to buy a suitable home outright. Although I do not want to take any, would I be entitled to a share of her inheritance in order to ensure I am able to purchase a suitable home for me and my children?

Annoynmous at 08.08.2022 10:21:40

2775

My wife and I are separated and looking to go through an amicable divorce. Over recent years she has reduced her working hours although in order to agree on a suitable spousal allowance I would expect her to aim to increase her working hours a certain amount. Assuming we can agree on a target income for her how should this be recorded in the future income section of the D81. Can a target income be recorded here that she is not currently earning? If not I am unsure how information regarding earnings capacity would be recorded.

Mark at 03.08.2022 12:16:34

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Hi, myself and my wife have been separated for 8 years. We have a joint mortgage, she has been living in the house since we separated with our kids, paying the mortgage and upkeep with her new partner. They have also had a child together. I am keen to get the divorce moving and to remove myself from the mortgage with my equity, ideally, I would like her and her partner to buy me out and take on the mortgage themselves, how best can I resolve this please as they have shown no intention to do this so far. thanks

Andrew at 12.07.2022 14:43:02

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My husband said we have to do a 50 / 50 split with everything we have, in theory I am ok with this but want to make sure this is correct. I wish to remain in the house but can’t afford the mortgage or to buy my husband out, and we still owe money on the mortgage. What are my options? And is it right to do the 50 split ….

Millie at 06.07.2022 19:52:02

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My ex wants to sell our family home and split the equity 50/50 to each purchase a new property. He earns roughly double my income with much larger future earning potential and I look after the children 5 nights a week. If we sold I would need to move into a much cheaper home in a less nice area where we would be able to buy a home of around the same value to the one we own now in the same area or without a sale he could rent an equivalent property in the area. I do not feel this is a fair split and he refuses to discuss pensions. I do not want to go to court but don’t feel these terms are fair to me or the children. Where do I stand legally?

Victoria at 26.06.2022 14:28:23

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hi, im Colombian married with a British citizen, we got married in colombia in October 2013, i have got the spouse visa for 2 years in 2014 to be able to go to uk for holidays but we were living in Honkong for 5 years, where i also got dependant spouse visa, with covid situation i haven t been able to go back to hong kong and now my husband is cheating on me, so i want to get the divorce , but he doesn t want me to talk about his properties in England and i don t know if i can register my marriage in uk in order to know what legally belongs to me? i really need help as my situation is very difficult and in colombia they cant do anything about his properties and i also don't know how to get access to his properties information, can you please advice me what can i do what is the process to follow, is there anything i can do, before he takes advantage of the sitaution?

francy at 22.06.2022 23:21:49

1935

Hi, I've been married for 6 years. I moved to the UK to be with my husband and relocated my whole life with the intention that we would move back to America eventually. He is now ending our marriage. I am going to have to move back to America alone and once again uproot my life. I will have no secure income there, place to live, etc. Am I entitled to him paying for me to relocate?

Courtney at 13.06.2022 22:05:38

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Hi, I have no clue if you can help us or not. My husband left 3 years ago. Looking back now it think it was as scare tactic. We talked and agreed I would find out about what we could or couldn't do legally. Then talked some more. He was very persistent about not going down the legal road and we agreed it was silly to do a legal separation as the cost was too great and it was not necessary at that point. The relationship didn't get any better and he started being very horrible. I came to the realisation that I had actually been in a manipulative and controlled marriage for 24 years (had been with him on and off for 10 years before that). when he left our children were 28 and 21, we had bought our council house 2 years previously using my inheritance for the deposit. He had always wanted to buy a house but I had not, it felt at the time the right thing to do with my parents hard earned money. (He was not mentioned in the will and the money did not go through a joint account, straight from my Dad's estate to my account then to the solicitor for the house, I also used the inheritance to pay off our debts). I have always worked (when the children were small only part time but then he was working shifts and I was doing most of the childcare and running around etc). Therefore I feel very much that it is a 50/50 up until I put the money down for the house purchase. This purchase came with conditions. if we sold within 5 years there was money due back to the council. He went of to work in the USA late 2019 and I called a solicitor to see if they could advise me on my next steps. Unfortunately they couldn't as they had already had consultation with him. This scared me a little as he had said he wasn't going down the legal road. So I found another solicitor and started the ball rolling my end. He reacted really badly and has accused me of all sorts over the last 3 years. We have gone back and forth so many times it has got so ridiculous. I have had some bad advice from my previous solicitor who has now left the company this has not helped my case. He forced me to sell the house last year and this meant we lost out and we are still no further forward. If the house had sold this year after February 22nd we have probably in the region of £70000.00 more in the solicitor account than we currently do. He earns nearly double what I do and I believe he is living with his girlfriend. I am living in a friends spare room, I do have a boyfriend, I have no intention of living with him at all ever as it not that kind of relationship. The issue is that I don't have any money, I am in debt as I had to pay the mortgage on the house on my own, I did have lodgers that helped but the last months I did not. so I have debt to pay off from that and a massive solicitor bill (they are allowing me to pay this when the settlement is done) I don't have the money for Mediators, Miam and court fees and this is kind of where it has got to. I have email my husband this week to see if we can go back and revisit a previous offer (I ended up rejecting it due my solicitors advice, the new one has advised me differently) I am praying and hoping he will see the light and come on board with me. But I am honestly not holding out much hope. All the way through i have made offers, trying to get him on board before the house went on the market, with options of how we could help each other out to get the best outcome. There is also a few pensions involved. At the beginning I was happy for him to keep his but now I need my share or off setting. He has wrecked our children neither of them have anything to do with him, not my doing at all. He manipulated our son and then just threw him away when he was done with him. Because our Daughter wouldn't put up with his attitude and saw through him he stopped seeing her. Everyone in the family thinks it is my fault and he is the victim, it does make me want to scream from the roof tops about the abuse both mental and physical that I went through for so many years and let people know what he actually is but I don't, I just rise above it and try to support my children. I need to bring this to conclusion but feel that i have it in me and definitely do not have the money to go through the court process.

April at 06.04.2022 9:46:43

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Hi, If both parties agree on a financial settlement (regardless of split 50/50, 70/30, leave with what you brought etc) can this be granted without the costly additional mediation, legal and courts fees? Thanks

martyn at 06.04.2022 6:24:27

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I have been married since May 2017. I am considering a divorce but it is not something that my husband is currently aware of. Prior to marrying my husband had no assets but I owned my home. He gained parental responsibility for my youngest child. He say he does not want any of my assets and will divorce and sign a clean break order - is it possible to use this service to achieve this or would it be more appropriate to set up a family trust fund now and then seek a divorce at a later date, to protect my assets.

Alison at 10.03.2022 13:15:43

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Hello After a short marriage of 7yrs and even shorter living together of 3ys In terms of our 'unconventional' marriage, does anyone know how the UK legal system are likely to view such a short-term living arrangement ? albeit we regularly saw each other every weekend. Im concerned the courts will not be favourable to my cause of claiming pension sharing order because of the shortness of living together ? No children from this relationship I would prefer a frank overview here so I can decide what to do next. Thank you"

Garry at 08.02.2022 22:53:44

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Hi. Needing advice on property buy out options. We have been living apart for 10 months now since march 2021 and beginning plans to divorce. Current childcare arrangements working well. With Dad (2-3 nights a week). The main thing we need to agree on is the house. We both want me and the kids to stay in the family house long term, or at least have the option of kids growing up here still. But I'm unlikely to be able to afford a full buyout through remortgage any time soon and no significant savings to help out. I am currently covering all of the house mortgage and upkeep costs. We're not sure of our options here. Can amicable help with this?

Natalie at 22.01.2022 22:53:20

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Me and my husband are thinking of getting a legal separation instead of divorce at this stage Do we legally need to split our assets? Ie sell the house and business etc

Joanna at 16.01.2022 14:42:37

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My sister and I jointly own two flats which we bought with money from our mum. We rent out the flats and any money we earn has always been transferred into our joint accounts that we both have with our respective husbands. My husband says that I have destroyed the marriage because I wouldn't split from my sister financially and he is wanting to claim half of the flats as his. Can he do this?

Julia at 08.11.2021 16:47:11

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Hi, I have been married 32 years and my husband has always been extremely irresponsible with money. He does pay £1000 per month into a joint account but other than that pays nothing into the family pot. He has a reliable but not not well job and spends far above his income. Three times in the past we have remortgaged the home to release cash to pay his debts. I earn more than him and pay for all luxuries or extras including the family car. He has, yet again, maxed out his credit cards so is looking for me to help. I have no issue with him choosing to stay in low paid work, but I do expect him to live within his means and not to expect me to subsidise a lifestyle that he can’t afford. He has always refused to pay into a pension saying he can’t afford it, preferring to spend on bikes and other expensive hobbies. I have spent my whole life saving and planning for a good retirement which his uncontrolled spending is putting into jeopardy, however, if I divorce him, he will presumably be entitled to half my pension anyway? Is there anyway I can protect my pension that I have worked so hard for?

Gennie at 24.10.2021 7:03:32

2213

Hi. Myself and husband agreed over a conversation that we would split the value of the house 50/50 as I want to relocate (have wanted to move for years but we couldn't agree together). He is going to buy me out and is nearly at the stage where he wants to take my name off the mortgage in order to remortgage in order for me to make an offer on a property elsewhere (this is becoming increasingly difficult to secure property - but that's another problem), what I need to get right in my head is full disclosure as I have been advised quite strongly that when a child is involved then full financial disclosure is best as I may be entitled to more than a 50/50 split. Im not trying to be greedy, I'm just wanting him to co-ooerate about his finances. We have already had a disagreement as he sold his car (I never drove it), but as an asset I disagreed with this. Also, its looking likely that what we previously agreed as a 50/50 split from the house is leaving me short to buy a house AND pay for all the legal stuff that goes with a house. What is the best way to get financial advise - I have suggested to him that we should upgrade to full service to have coaching sessions for the financial bit as it is upmost important but he doesn't seem to be taking it seriously - I think because he has a hold over me whereas the finances are concerned. TIA

Zahrah at 15.10.2021 10:35:53

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Hello, Im Nicola. I have been split from my ex for 4 years now. Last year i asked him about divorce and we both agreed on a 50/50 split with the house. Today i asked him the same question and he thinks that because he has paid the mortgage for the last 4 years that its no longer a 50/50 split on the house. Which he locked me and the kids out of and changed the locks 4 yrs ago. The house still has £46,000 to be paid and roughly 66k has been paid off already. We both split the mortgage payments while we were together for 10 yrs prior to him kicking us out. Can i just get some thoughts on this please? There is a little more to it but i'll leave it at that. Thanks

Nicola at 30.08.2021 14:19:12

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Hi my wife has asked for a separation and wants me to move out to give her headspace, I know I have no obligation to agree but am trying to keep things as amicable as possible. If I do, how will it be viewed if we do divorce ie neglect of responsibilities, and what impact could it have on the financial settlement? Any help greatly appreciated, regards C.

Craig at 06.08.2021 15:22:59

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My husband is a 50% director of his Ltd company, with his best friend holding the other 50% He is currently taking hardly any dividends out saying that he needs to keep it in the company as that means it doesn't become part of the divorce pot due to it being a limited company Is this correct, can ge do this? It seems unfair as he will definitely expect a share of my savings and surely that's what his retained monies in the company are?!

Ruth at 25.06.2021 21:45:37

2322

My husband and I are in the initial chat stage of a potential separation. He is a 50% director of his limited company with a friend and he has been 'saving' money here by effectively reducing his dividends, arguing this is his future fund?! Is he able to do this, does anyone know? It seems unfair that he can effectively ring fence funds like this but my savings accounts will be fair game?

KAREN at 25.06.2021 16:29:34

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Hi, I am splitting from my wife after 6 years of marriage. We have a 16-year old stepdaughter and 2 6-year old twins. the twins will live with me going forward. We now live at separate addresses - myself in my parents' spare room with the younger 2 children, and my wife in the former marital home. I am currently still paying for the mortgage on the marital home. The younger children go to my wife most weekends, so they spend about 6 nights per month with her. My wife doesn't work. My wife has not worked during the 10-year relationship. The relationship can be summarised as: * 3 years, I supported my wife and stepdaughter financially. She didn't work. * 4 years, my wife was pregnant/ a SAHM * 2 years: younger children went to school, but my wife still didn't work. The last 6 months we have been separated and I have still been supporting my wife financially, while having the younger children living with me. Throughout the relationship I have been the sole breadwinner and financially supported both my wife and stepdaughter. I brought in assets from prior to the marriage and these were used to buy the marital home. I know that homemaking contributions are taken into account as equal to breadwinner, but on the face of a marriage of such unequal contributions, will I still have to give her 50% of assets? For example, before having children together, there were 3 years of total financial dependence on me. For me it seems grossly unfair if I have to give my wife 50% of my net worth, about half of which predates meeting her. Would a departure from 50-50 be considered under the circumstances? My wife has no qualifications and I'm quite highly qualified so can earn a fair amount more than her. Thank you!

vdfhfaadfsdf at 23.06.2021 14:24:27

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My husband moved in 14 years ago as the boyfriend who paid rent, we were initially renting a property, but once I got my divorce money I wanted to buy a house to provided security for my two children. He was not in a position to buy a property as he already had a mortgage with his ex wife. The agreement was he paid rent and I used a combination of his rent money, kids maintenance and my own money to pay the mortgage and bills. I paid for all home improvements, loft conversion, conservatory, new windows and door, as we moved in I put in a new kitchen, boiler and bathroom. We married in May 2015 and much to my surprise this arrangement continued, as the felt in the roof had rotted and I had to pay the full repair bill. We have just separated and he is now telling me he has a claim from when he first moved in. My initial deposit brought 45.5% of the property and I raised a mortgage for the remaining 53.5%. Over the year I have spent in the region of £57-£60,000 using family inheritance on home improvements. We spilt up at one point before marriage and he moved out for six months and returned as a rent payer. During his own divorce in 2009 he recorded himself as the tenant. I have provided him with a home that he could bring his children too when they were younger. It all seems so very unfair when he has a share in his previous material home, his parents are wealthy and have offered to buy him a property, initially a buy to let he is telling me, but he will inherit big time. He is not only taking away from me, but also my kids future inheritance. How can I stop this?

Irene Solley at 14.06.2021 12:54:05

2653

Hello. My ex-partner has stated that they will only accept my petition for divorce if they get 50% of my pension and 50% of the equity in the home once it is sold. (I have no problem with this). However, my ex wants to sell immediately to have access to the equity. I am neither in a position to remortgage, because of my credit rating, or to sell because I will struggle to rent a property suitable for when I have our children (3 children, I have them each week, every other weekend and some school holidays). I would like to offer to buy my ex out of the property over a 4 year period at a set amount per month. Do you know if there is a mechanism for doing this? And, should my ex challenge it, would the court consider my offer a suitable one? Is this what a consent order is for? Thank you in advance.

Paul at 23.05.2021 9:45:57

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Trying to understand how finances are split and when Looking to sell house in next 6 months, split house proceeds 50% and move into our own either owned or rented accommodation At this point we agree that pension statements will be taken and probably no change to either of us from an asset provision perspective Looking for a 2 year separation prior to applying for divorce I earn double that of my wife Will she be entitled to a proportion of my additional earnings during this 2 year period?

Dave richardson at 06.04.2021 16:59:30

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We are happy to do the divorce paperwork ourselves and we will agree how to split the finances amicably. We just want what we agree to be legalised. can this be done and how much would this cost?

Allison H at 26.02.2021 15:56:13

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My wife wants a separation, she has the council property in her name and i am a named family member. Can she legally remove me from the house

Andy Curtis at 11.11.2020 14:20:21

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Hi would like to know if the Decree Absolute will be made and finalized by the courts before they the judge decides on the Financials if we have opted for the Courts to Decide on Financials? And if I am in the country and cannot attend for when the financial hearing is, will I be excused or would I need a be represented by a solicitor?

Violet Cocking at 17.05.2019 6:51:04

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Separated from wife 2014, she remained in house. In 2016 we agreed split of house sale (she bought with new partner). She received £75000 I got 29000. However now going through divorce and on consent order she is showing as only having 37500. She says her solicitor has said it is correct as she now owns house with new partner so her original amount is now halved. On paper it looks like she only received 37500 when infant she got 75000. Can this be correct.

Paul Jones at 17.05.2019 4:02:27

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I have received my decree absolute and have been now registered as divorced in Uk. The ex wife wants to sort out finances and has bought up a property that i owned back in 2015. Me and the ex split 2015 feb and i sold this property in july 2015. I payed the mortgage as i was the sole eaner in the family. I worked and paid mortgage. the ex wife did not work. we have 4 children who are with the ex. I would like to know i sold the property and repaying off the remainder of the mortgage i had gained about 32,000 pounds. Some was given back to family relatives who helped me put a deposit down for the property and most was used on gambling as at the time i was gambling in stress. I would like to know what rights does my ex wife have on this property even though its sold and money has been wasted. will the court make me earn the share of 32,000 and pay her half of the amount. how will it work. please advise

Zee at 11.05.2019 2:20:57

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Not sure if you help couples like us… we aren’t agreeing on everything at the moment and want some help. Do you work with couples who don’t agree on absolutely everything? We’ve been trying to work out what’s fair for both of us in relation to how we split our property etc but we keep disagreeing.

chloec at 05.11.2017 8:03:06

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We are nearly half way through the divorce at decri nisi stage and have just found out that we need to do a separate form to make our financial split legal. Is this right? Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanksd

DWG at 05.05.2018 8:02:52

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At what point do we need to pay the court fees?

Damien2018 at 05.04.2018 8:02:43

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For 25 long years my lazy lying alcoholic husband didn’t pay me any money or support me, I had to rely on my part time job and parents lending me money. I had to pay all the bills and the mortgage, support the children, I helped him in his business, I did all the housework, gardening, supported the children. He used to shout and swear at us and arrive home drunk. The house is in my name as I put the money in for our first home and due to my hard work I gradually built up a buy to let portfolio of 5 flats. I have had to sell 2 to pay bills as I now support my Mum who has dementia and my son is unemployed. We live in the family home. In 2013 my husband left me for another woman and lied to me about his affair for years. In 2014 I had a heart attack due to stess. I have truly suffered mental and physical abuse. He is renting a house with this other woman and is still carrying on his electrical business. He has paid me no maintenance for the children and we had an agreement when the children were born that he was to pay £50 a month into savings accounts for them so when they were 18 they would have some money. They are now 19 and 20 and couldn’t go to University because what money he did put in he took most of it out again. I suffered anxiety, depression throughout our marriage. He was a hands off father. His mother won the health lottery and is in her 80s. My mother is 94 with dementia and I will be left half her home. I have a huge mortgage on my home and a whopping £2,2k mortgage on it and due to Government regulations although it was a porting mortgage they are refusing to transfer the mortgage. I have had money worries all my married life. I have proof of his drinking and videos of his verbal abuse. I do not want to give him another penny, I just need to hang on to what I have without this leech getting his hands on even more. I have to pay a lot back to my Mum’s estate on the loan. I went to mediation 4xs and it was just a fiasco, no finances were even discussed, I am sure the solicitor was just making the most of the time and cost us a fortune for nothing, it was more like a counselling session. We didn’t even discuss the finances. I have a little bit coming in from 2 buy to lets but I have to sell one as they won’t extend the mortgage and there isn’t much capital in the flat. I have a bad credit rating due to credit cards I had to use to survive. I have a lodger. Do I have to give him half?

Dramlouie at 05.06.2018 8:02:40

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In a divorce settlement how can a pension fund cash value be considered equivalent to other assets such as cash in the bank or the house. A pension is subject to income tax on withdrawal of up to 40% and it cannot be used at all until the age of 55. As a result the comparison to assets that can be spent today and have no tax attached is incorrect. Ie as an example I would rather be given 400,000 cash today than 500,000 in a pension fund I can’t access for 20 years and I will pay tax on when I can access.

downnotout at 05.07.2018 8:02:33

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What is the exact amount to comprise for a legal divorce? Is it accurately 50/50 division of assets in both parties?

sadipeterson at 05.07.2018 8:02:30

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Hi I split with my husband last summer, house has been for sale for almost a year with less than 10 viewings, have changed estate agent & reduced price a couple of times but he is refusing to reduce again – stuck in this – what can i do?

sarahol at 05.07.2018 8:02:22

4206

We have just had an acceptable offer on our home. My ex had said she would pay half towards the renovations that were required to get it sold with the amount to be paid out of the proceeds of the sale and she is now refusing to pay that amount. I currently live in the hous with our 2 grown up children. I would rather get the house sold and move on but it appears that holding the sale up may be my only bargaining chip to get her to meet her obligations. Both the children are witnesses to the originial agreement but unfortunately I didn’t get it in writing. Any advice on what my options are would be gratefully received Thanks

dode415 at 05.08.2018 8:02:09

4150

Will try and keep this short! Married Oct last year. Marriage ended after 6 weeks, he moved out straight away to his dads. He moved into his own flat (rented) approx 2 months later. I have recently discovered this was actually with another woman (who is into drugs quite a lot, speed and coke) I found out yesterday she is also pregnant. Financially…I earn approx £45k a year; he earns approx half. We were living together for 4 years, the last year of which was in a house purchased while we were together (the previous house we lived in I purchased before he moved in) Everything is and always has been in my name, the house deposit, mortgage, all bills, credit cards etc. We have no joint accounts. Money was paid to me for bills, however always in cash and not every week as agreed. Also there was a car purchased for him on my credit card (3k) which was meant to be paid for via a cheque (wedding present from his dad) that he ripped up before I had a chance to cash it. I’m now paying for his car, although it is in my name. I had suggested that I keep paying for his car, and he walks away as a financial agreement….however the woman he is now with is well known for being a medium level drug user and very interested in money. I’m now concerned that everything I’ve worked very hard for all my life is at stake. With it being such a short marriage….what would happen if he wanted the courts to decide on finances? Is he likely to be able to claim anything from me etc? Thank you in advance!

spiralisedcat at 05.08.2018 8:02:06

4478

Married 8 years, house deposit and all mortgage payments met solely by myself. Husband not on mortgage due to adverse credit. No children. He wants 50% plus half my pension. Doesn’t seem prepared to accept less and wants to go to court. I left him due to gambling addiction, alcohol issues and not contributed financially. What is the likely outcome?

charcole at 04.10.2018 9:02:04

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