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05.08.2018 8:02:06


New to the forum and would be grateful for some guidance. I’ll provide a little context behind my question. My ex moved out a year ago. I still live in the property, joint mortgage, with our daughter and my ex now lives between their new partner and their new residence. Since then my ex has used funds from an old joint bank account to pay her debts/bills and refuses to pay these back or even accept this was wrong to do. I’m paying the mortgage and will do so until our daughter’s 18th when I will either sell or buy my ex out. I suffered a mental breakdown and have suffered from anxiety and panic attacks since the separation. As a result, my social and work life has suffered greatly. I have asked my ex to allow me to change the locks or hand the key in as I do not have privacy and whenever I see them I relapse and have further panic attacks. My request has been rejected. My ex still has personal belongings in the house.
I have recently found out my ex has taken, without approval or discussion, family photo albums and has also been through my financial affairs. My ex’s solicitor has been instructed not to correspond with me, to keep their costs down, so despite my attempts to bring this matter to a conclusion I’m being met with brick walls. My ex feels they’re entitled to come and go whenever they please, despite them knowing about my mental health issues. Legally, I know they can come to the property but I have suggested regular inspections to ensure their security isn’t at risk but this has been ignored. I’ve attempted mediation which both my ex and their solicitor ignored. It’s very difficult to put into words the stress and anxiety I’m under so the question I have is, is there anything I can do knowing they’ve removed items and been through my financial paperwork. Could I change the locks or is an occupancy order the only route. I sincerely hope I don’t have to go to court as I know my mental health, and my bank balance, will not be able to cope.

Replies (2)

Hannah Hodgkinson
05.08.2018 8:02:06

Hi ghostdancer, you are in a tricky situation and it’s most likely that you will need to revert to the court to sort this out. It’s clear you have tried to be reasonable to sort things out amicably but as this has met with no success you are best advised to find a solicitor or direct access barrister who can help you get a court order – such as an occupation order to resolve this.

05.09.2018 8:02:06

Dear Ghostdancer, i’m sorry about your story. As your ex partner has moved out you have the right to change the locks. Your partner misuses your mental condition. Please take a look at a divorce guide here which is free to download. Maybe you will find some answers for you. Your case is special and you need a lawyer who will behave as hard with your ex as they do.


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