How to cope with divorce or separation

Separation is an emotional journey with legal and financial consequences. Struggling to cope with divorce or separation is a natural part of the healing process.

In this blog, we'll explore our tips, advice and resources for helping you to cope with divorce.

Resources for coping with divorce and separation:

The emotional journey of divorce and separation isn’t the same for each person, but can be a useful tool for understanding your feelings and emotional state:

Join groups and communities

There are many online communities and groups that you can use to help support you through your divorce or separation. This is a great way to connect with people who are going through a similar experience to you and are more likely to understand how you feel.

There are also in-person options if you want to get out and about to meet new people. If you can’t find one local to you, consider setting one up as part of your healing journey.

Here are a few options:

• Frolo - a community for single parents
• Divorce Club - a community for separated people

Tip: Online communities are a great way to cope with divorce, but approach these with caution and look out for any members who are trying to inflame the amicability of your divorce.

Friends and family

Friends and family are useful in helping you cope with divorce in a practical and emotional way. If you have children, being able to use family for childcare, can be especially useful early on when you’re adjusting to a change in routine.

Friends can also be a great outlet, but remember that not everyone will be able to be there for you, or some may give unhelpful advice. Read our friends and family guide, and send it to your loved ones so they can understand how to support you in a better way.

Self-care, exercise and wellbeing

Self-care can often be the first thing to go out the window when we’re struggling to cope with divorce or separation, however, it’s also the tool to help you heal. Start to prioritise self-care and your wellbeing by setting time aside to go for a walk or do something that will help you feel better. Read our blog on mindfulness activities to help you during a divorce or separation.

Listen to this episode of The Divorce Podcast, where Kate Daly, Co-founder of amicable and host, was joined by Mark Groves to discuss self-growth and healing following breakups, separation and divorce:

Other resources:

Other resources include things like podcasts as well as coping with divorce books and guides.

• The Divorce Podcast (episodes on the emotional journey, mental health & well-being)
• Recognising and dealing with stress – article by GP, Dylan Watkins
• Tips to improve your mental health during divorce or separation – a podcast episode
• Eight relaxation tips – a short video to help with your wellbeing from Mind

Professional help & organisations:

If you’re not coping with divorce, or you're stuck in a particular part of the emotional journey there are many professionals who can help you, at different levels of affordability.

Charities:

• British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) - find a BACP registered counsellor
• Samaritans - a charity that provides emotional support to anyone in emotional distress, struggling to cope or at risk of suicide
• Mind - a charity offering advice and support to empower anyone experiencing mental health problems
• Relate offers relationship and family counselling in centres around the UK, as well as online and over the phone. If you’re working, your employer might offer free counselling through an employee assistance programme (EAP)
• OnePlusOne - the relationship charity
• Gingerbread's free Wellbeing Workshops - are a chance to meet other single parents and learn tools to manage stress and improve your wellbeing. These two-hour sessions are delivered online at times that fit around busy family lives.
• Dads Unlimited - a charity that aims to support dads to seek help for their mental health following a family breakdown, and help them improve their co-parenting relationships
• Employers & EAPs - speak to your work and find out if you’re able to access any resources or professional help
• British Red Cross - is a charity that can help you cope with loneliness a

Other professionals:

• Therapists - you can search for therapists online or contact your local mental health services
• Hub of Hope - can help you find mental health services in your area.
• Coaching - There are many different types of coaches who specialise in divorce and separation, many have direct experience and are trained to help you navigate the emotional journey
• EFT - Emotional Freedom Tequnieq (EFT) is a therapeutic way of coping with divorce. You work with an EFT specialist who will help your healing journey through tapping.

FAQs

How do I cope with divorce?

Coping with divorce is challenging, but there are many low-cost practical options, like going for a walk or trying mindfulness as well as therapeutic options such as therapy or counselling.

How do I cope with being alone after divorce?

Loneliness is common after a separation or divorce, getting in touch with friends and family can help you cope with loneliness as part of your separation.

How do you cope with a divorce after a long marriage?

Adjusting to change during a separation is challenging after a long marriage, however, using free tools, communities and professional help can help you build positive futures apart.