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Hi all, Ive found this forum really helpful over the last few months so thought I'd share where I'm at and see if anyone else is in the same boat.
My husband and I separated last summer after about 12 years together. We have two kids, Freya who's 8 and Noah who's 5. We actually stayed under the same roof until after Christmas, we didn't want to disrupt things for the kids over the holidays, so we've only really been properly living apart since January. We've been doing a rough week on/week off since then and its more or less working, not a formal agreement just something we fell into.
The problem is Easter is coming up and I honestly don't know how to handle it. This will be the first proper school holiday we've had to actually split, and I've been putting off the conversation because every time holidays come up it gets a bit tense, not hostile exactly, just a bit loaded.
Noah asked me last week if the Easter bunny knows he has two houses now, which absolutley floored me. I held it together in the moment but cried about it later in the car. He's fine, I know he's fine, but its those little things that catch you off guard isn't it.
Practically speaking I don't really know whether to suggest splitting the two weeks down the middle, alternating who has Easter Sunday itself, or whether we try and spend part of it together for the kids sake, which feels nice in theory but I'm not sure either of us is quite ready for that. He also mentioned his mum wants the kids to visit for a few days which I wasn't expecting and didn't really know what to say to.
Has anyone worked out a system for school holidays that actually feels fair rather than just whoever pushes hardest getting their way? And for those who've been through a first Easter after separating, is it as hard as I'm imagining or does it end up being okay?
Any honest thoughts appreciated, good or bad.