amicable is an app for divorcing and separating couples. The app is designed to help you to organise your separation and ultimately to collaborate with your partner to reach an amicable agreement or divorce.
You can use the app in two ways – in solo mode to collate you own data – or as a collaborative tool to make agreements with your partner and to set the foundations for a co-parenting relationship.
If you choose to use the full potential of the app, in collaborative mode, you should be aware that like any collaborative tool, the app only works when both people are willing to engage and behave in accordance with certain ground rules. Our app ground rules are set out here:
I agree to: * Keep focused on the future, fairness and the interests of our children * Only enter a dialogue when I am calm and not to respond in anger * Act and respond in good faith, integrity and with transparency to ensure a future relationship can be built on trust * Be patient if my partner does not respond as quickly as I would like and ask questions to understand their perspective * Be open, honest and exchange all the information required to make our agreements. Not to lie by omission * Respond to my partner in a timely manner * Be polite and respectful at all times – not to swear or name call * Use the app in a constructive way Conflict is perfectly natural in times of emotional upheaval and amicable is an aspiration rather than a starting point for many couples. However, it is import to understand the difference between safe and unsafe conflict.
The following indicators are signs that it may not be safe to collaborate on the app and that solo mode or additional support services such as a lawyer or specialist Domestic Abuse counsellor are required. * Are you afraid of your partner? * Do you feel isolated, cut you off from family and friends? * Does your partner exhibit any of the following behaviour: jealous, possessive, insulting, verbally abusive, hurts you physically, constantly criticises you, blames you for everything, damages your things? * Does (s)he say you are useless and couldn’t cope without him/her? * Has (s)he threatened to hurt you or people close to you? * Is (s)he charming one minute and abusive the next? Like Dr Jekyll / Mr Hyde? * Does your partner control your money? * Do you change your behaviour to avoid triggering an attack? * Are you unsure of your own judgement? * Does (s)he threaten to kidnap or get custody of the children? * Does your partner drive fast because he knows it scares you? * Does your partner lock you out of the house during an argument? If you think you may be experiencing abuse, please call the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0800 2000 247 or go online at www.refuge.org.uk to find out how to stay safe.
The ethos of amicable is to encourage positive, open dialogue to build agreements. Open discussions between you are the building blocks of resolving issues on how to e.g. co-parent your children and how to split your assets. Being free to exchange posts which may incorporate different proposals is critical to the progress and success of your negotiations. For this reason, and in-line with other cooperative approaches to separation and divorce, the content of your posts (and any proposals made in your posts) on the app are deemed to be “Without Prejudice” communications (“WP Communications”) and have general evidential privilege. If the process breaks down, your WP Communications will generally prevent your WP Communications made in a genuine attempt to settle an existing dispute, from being put before the court as evidence of admissions against your interests. However, Your WP Communications may be admitted in evidence under certain circumstances. For example: * Discussions comprising your WP Communications may be examined if one of you is asserting that a settlement was reached i.e. WP communications may be admissible to determine whether the parties did in fact agree terms and to determine the reasonableness of a settlement. * The factual data (e.g. some financial information contained in the assets & debts section, as opposed to financial principles, proposals or information about interests), may be produced to a court. Any budget of future spending is declared without prejudice in the amicable app and this includes any downloaded data.