What happens in a military divorce?

If you or your partner are in the Armed Forces and you’re going through a divorce, the legal process is the same as for civilians, but you'll navigate extra challenges like military pensions, housing and frequent relocations.

Let's break down what you need to know about military divorce in the UK.

Military divorce in the UK

Going through a military divorce brings unique challenges that civilian couples don't face. Whether you're serving in the Armed Forces or married to someone who is, you'll need to think about additional things like your Service Family Accommodation (SFA), military pension and how deployments affect your arrangements.

These factors can really impact how your divorce plays out, particularly when it comes to sorting out your housing situation and financial support arrangements. It's crucial that you understand how military life affects your personal circumstances - after all, those frequent relocations, deployments and the demanding nature of service life can seriously complicate things for both you and your ex-partner when you're trying to make arrangements.

Being aware of these unique military-specific aspects can help you prepare for what's ahead and make sure you're making informed decisions as you work through the divorce process.

Listen to our podcast episode where we speak with former combat pilot Sarah Furness about her divorce.

How does the divorce process work for military families?

The divorce process is the same whether you're in the military or not.

Here's what happens:

• Divorce application – one of you applies to the court
• 20-week reflection period – time to consider reconciliation or make arrangements
• Conditional order – confirms the court agrees your marriage has broken down
• Final order – legally ends your marriage (at least six weeks after conditional order) Being in the Armed Forces doesn't change these stages or timelines. You're still divorcing under the law of England and Wales like anyone else.

Want to understand each stage in detail? Read our guide on how long it takes to get divorced.

Applying for divorce

When you're applying for divorce as military personnel, it's important to consider the unique aspects of your military service that may affect the process. You'll need to think about factors such as your entitlement to military benefits, the impact on your family members and making arrangements for your children and housing.

In some cases, your Local Service Commander may grant you a 'cooling off' period of up to three months, giving you and your partner time to reflect, seek support or make practical arrangements before you proceed. This period can be especially helpful if you're a service family facing the pressures of military life.

It's also important to think about how your military service might affect your eligibility for certain benefits or housing, and to seek advice on how best to protect your interests and those of your family during this transition.

This can be trickier if you’re in the military because you might not have a fixed address in the UK, or you might be stationed abroad.

Can I apply for divorce if I'm serving abroad?

Yes, you can usually apply for divorce in England and Wales even if you're posted overseas. You or your spouse will need to meet one of these requirements:

• Habitually resident in England and Wales - this is where you normally live, even if you're away temporarily
• Domiciled in England and Wales - this is where you consider your permanent home to be, or where you intend to return to
• If you're in the military and are serving abroad but England and Wales is your home, you can typically use the UK courts for your divorce. But if you and your spouse are both living abroad permanently with no connections to England and Wales, you might need to apply for divorce in the country where you’re living instead.
• If you’re not sure whether you can apply in England and Wales, get in touch with one of our Divorce Specialists for a free consultation. This is one area where the rules can be complex and it’s worth checking you’re doing it right - we can help you explore your options and make sure you meet all the necessary requirements.

Attending court

Most divorces don’t actually require you to attend court. The whole process is done by paperwork.

But if you do need to attend court, for a financial hearing or a dispute about children, that’s obviously difficult if you’re deployed abroad.

The court can sometimes allow you to attend by video link, or they might adjourn the hearing until you’re back in the UK. But this can delay the process significantly.

Complications in military divorce

When you're going through a military divorce, you'll find it's often more complex than your typical separation because of factors like sorting out child maintenance arrangements, dividing up military pensions, and figuring out housing situations.

If you're service personnel or married to someone in the forces, you'll need to tackle issues such as working out child maintenance when you're dealing with frequent relocations or deployments, and getting your head around how your military pension will be split as part of your financial settlement.

These complications can make your divorce process more challenging than you might expect, so it's really important that you seek specialist advice to make sure your rights and entitlements are properly protected throughout your proceedings.

What happens to my military pension in divorce?

Military pensions are often the most valuable asset in a service divorce. The Armed Forces Pension Scheme is a defined benefit pension, which means its value is based on your salary and length of service - not on how much has been contributed.

Dividing a military pension fairly is crucial. If you don't sort this out during your divorce, accessing a share of your ex-partner's pension later becomes extremely difficult.

How is a military pension divided in divorce?

When the court is deciding how to divide your pension, they'll consider several factors:

• How long you've been married
• Your age and health (and your spouse's)
• What you can both earn Your options include something called pension sharing, where a portion of the pension gets transferred to your non-military spouse, or offsetting, where the value of your pension is balanced against other assets you have.

The court's main goal is to achieve a fair and reasonable outcome for you both, taking into account the unique circumstances that come with military life. When you seek specialist advice, you'll understand your options properly and can make informed decisions about your financial future, including things like child maintenance, housing and other finances.

Pension sharing

This is where a percentage of your pension is transferred to your ex-spouse. They get their own separate pension credit which they can either keep within the Armed Forces Pension Scheme or transfer elsewhere.

Pension sharing creates a clean break, which means once it’s complete you each have your own separate pension and there’s no ongoing financial link. Personal pensions, including your own personal pension, are also important assets to consider in the financial settlement, especially for non-serving partners who may have faced barriers to building their own pension due to the military lifestyle.

Read more about pension sharing orders here.

Offsetting

This is where you keep your full military pension, but your ex gets a larger share of other finances to balance it out. For example, they might get more of the equity in the family home, or more of the savings.

Offsetting can work well if there are enough other finances to make it fair.

Military pensions are complex. We strongly recommend getting advice from a Pensions on Divorce Expert (a PODE) if your military pension is worth over £100,000 or if you’re considering offsetting.

A PODE can tell you what the pension is actually worth in real terms, not just what the Cash Equivalent Transfer Value (CETV) says. They can help you understand whether the proposed division is fair.

Read more about pension sharing orders.

Practical challenges in a military divorce

Applying for divorce

If your spouse is serving abroad or at sea, applying for divorce and starting the process can be tricky. The court has special procedures for this, but it can slow things down.

You might need to send the paperwork to them via their commanding officer or through military mail systems. Get advice on the right procedure for your situation.

What happens with children during a military divorce?

After separation, you’ll need to make formal child arrangements covering where your children will live, contact schedules and financial support. These are especially important in military divorce due to the unique demands of service life.

If you have children, their welfare is always the top priority in any divorce. But military life adds complications.

Frequent deployments or postings affect how much time the serving parent can spend with the children. Most commonly, children live primarily with the non-serving parent and spend time with the serving parent during leave periods when they're not deployed.

What child arrangements work for military families?

You’ll need to work out arrangements that are realistic given military commitments. This includes:

• Where the children will live (this is usually with the non-serving parent)
• Visitation schedules that work around deployments, postings and leave
• Financial support through child maintenance
• How you'll communicate when the serving parent is away Try to stay flexible. Military life is unpredictable, and your parenting arrangements might need to adapt as postings and deployments change.

Getting professional support with your divorce

amicable can help with military divorces. Our Divorce Specialists understand the complications relating to service families and can guide you through the process. We can also connect you with PODEs who specialise in military pensions when needed.

You can book a free 15-minute consultation to discuss your situation and work out your next steps.

FAQs

Is military divorce different from civilian divorce in the UK?

The legal divorce process is exactly the same for military and civilian couples. You'll go through the same stages and timelines. However, military life creates additional challenges around pensions, housing, children arrangements and court attendance that need specialist understanding.

Can I apply for divorce if I'm stationed abroad?

Yes, you can usually apply for divorce in England and Wales if you're posted overseas, as long as you or your spouse are habitually resident here or consider England and Wales your permanent home. If you're unsure whether you can apply here, book a free consultation with an amicable Divorce Specialist.

What happens to my military pension when I divorce?

Military pensions can be divided through pension sharing (where a percentage transfers to your ex-spouse) or offsetting (where you keep your pension but your ex gets more of other assets). We recommend getting advice from a Pensions on Divorce Expert if your pension is worth over £100,000.

How do deployments affect child arrangements in military divorce?

Deployments and frequent postings mean you'll need flexible children arrangements. Usually, children live primarily with the non-serving parent and spend time with the serving parent during leave periods. Try to build in flexibility as military commitments can change.

What happens to Service Family Accommodation after military divorce?

Your eligibility for Service Family Accommodation may change after divorce. This is one of the important factors you'll need to consider when making your separation arrangements. An amicable Divorce Specialist can help you understand your housing options.

Do I need a specialist solicitor for military divorce?

You don't necessarily need a solicitor at all. amicable's Divorce Specialists understand military divorce and can guide you through the process. For complex pension division, we'll connect you with a Pensions on Divorce Expert (PODE) who specialises in military pensions.